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Hoodwinked!
It’s embarrassing. It’s frustrating. It happens.
Have you ever signed up for something, only to discover it was not what you expected?
Have you experienced a charming individual who turned out to be someone else over time?
Have you ordered online, and received an item nothing like the photo and description of what you were purchasing?
Were you fooled by someone else’s perception of how things should be? Were you so excited over a new experience that you missed the red flags — and they became a hood covering your own eyes?
To hoodwink someone was originally to cover someone’s eyes with a hood or a blindfold. The term caught on and developed into figuratively veiling the truth.
Did you know the Mirriam Webster dictionary has seventy-five synonyms for hoodwinked? These include such descriptors as deceived, betrayed, and tricked. No wonder you’re feeling snookered.
When something feels wrong, it probably is. If you feel like you’re going crazy, second guessing your decisions, or making excuses for the actions of others, it’s time to look at what’s causing this behavior.
What’s really bothering you? Are you angry at the “hoodwinker,” or ashamed of the “hoodwinked”? Clarify this, then take small, deliberate steps towards identifying your own needs and boundaries. Look at what happened, without judgement. Be deliberate in standing up for yourself and (perhaps the most difficult), step away from caring about what others think.
It’s embarrassing. It’s frustrating. It happens.
Admitting to yourself that you were hoodwinked is the first step towards recovery. Quit that class, cancel your subscription, return that item. More difficult is walking away from a narcissist, but once you recognize this behavior, your survival instinct will kick in. You may need help disengaging in a healthy way, but it can be done.
There are support groups for the survivors of narcissism. Online or in person, your group is one quick Google search away. Be sure to look at the validity of the link you click on.
Don’t forget to breathe and realize that this is about you and your mental health.
Debunk the hoodwink. The power is yours.
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This article was published on February 26th, 2025 in Short. Sweet. Valuable. publication.
