As My Brother Grieves
Most people have experienced the death of someone who puts them in a state of grieving. Grandparents, parents, siblings, friends, pets, and other assorted beings who have left us behind to mourn the fact that they have moved on without us.
Recently, my brother became the first of my siblings to become a widower. This, I discovered, is a completely different experience than I expected.
Grief is not new to our family, but when a sibling loses a beloved spouse, it is the one left behind that you grieve for. Personally, I want to wrap my arms around my brother and make everything better. It breaks my heart to see him dealing with the loss of a life while figuring out what his new world will look like.
According to the census bureau at least 59% of adults aged 60 and older have only been married once. In my brother’s case — 38 years. He is the only one in the family to accomplish this feat thus far. So many memories. So much love and laughter. Sometimes the good times are the ones that bring on the flow of tears.
So, we gather around to offer support, to reminisce, to eat too much and share stories. When I told a friend of mine I had to cancel something because we were flying away for a memorial service, he replied, “Have some wonderful reunions.” We did. In spades.
